Silver
Produced by Pedal Boy & the Wrens
Released 1994, Grass Records
Silver - our first full length. Everyone should make a first record. Except us.
The record company gave us a “due date” and on that day, Jerry and Greg drove out to Long Island to personally hand the finished recording to our beloved Camille (i.e., the record company). There they stood in Camille’s office, proudly waiting for the first track (of 26) to cue up. Young. Excited. Already planning tour bus décor options.
Sadly though, we had made a series of the kind of dumb-ass musical/production decisions that people like Malcolm Gladwell can spend a career parsing – culminating in the wisdom of mixing the entire 26-song opus in one consecutive 18-hour all-nighter. This had the effect of combining most of our greatest strengths at the time - technical audio incompetence, unlevel-headedness in the face of looming deadlines, depressed exhaustion and an inability to self-edit – into one deadly 26-song musical power move.
Stunning.
So what fudged its way out of Camille’s speakers that day was maybe two decent songs, 24 others, and all sadly enveloped in the impenetrable low-end rumble of the approaching worms in Dune.
Camille, in her infinite kindness gently asked, “is this the way it’s supposed to sound?”
Greg & Jerry retreated home with mixed news of victory, we remixed over the next week or two and Charles has since listened to this album exactly twice. Because it’s just too good to bear.
MP3s
Lyrics
- Propane
- Napiers
- From His Lips
- What’s a Girl
- 6
- Leather Side
- Darlin Darlin
- Strange as Family
- Minion
- Crawling
- Ruth
- Learned in Space
- William
- Down to the Service
- Behold Me
- Dakota
- Kevin’s Hell
- Adanoi
- Me, the Misser, the Late
- Dust
- Gray Complextion
- Strengthless
- Decided Girl
- Broken
PROPANE
38 hours since I got you home safe
42 gallons of your favorite propane
9 bibles to rest your head on
picking up signals on a vacant highway
throwing down marbles in a field of stray boys
stop mister it’s not my time now
pre-school teacher vail over my face
my neighbor has 2 wives to his name
that class is over
I know the moon is blue
NAPIERS
from napiers bones to my hair brushed back I have it all figured out
these are incestuous fingers I’m fond of this one let me pull it back for you
convention is fine when it needed room I’ll never hold it close because it always lays me
saw a galaxy driving away i wonder if it could have been Sam
darken the cram with hard dated words I have to endure that this is it my only time
and shining through some years late I’ll have to hold it in I’ll have to wear it thin
FROM HIS LIPS
up on the ledge again during the lunch rush hour
I was the best picture yet for any clear tourist down below
but I never took any time to enjoy what a nice view it was up there
will you die for me just like I did for a thousand others
and i’m here in the sky i’ll wrap myself to the street below
as i feel the air like warm water down my spine - I’m free
God has shown i’ll break my bones i’ll tear the world out of its own
from his lips i’ll taste again
they’re marking off the street climbing the crowds to get the only clear view
i’m here in the sky God is known i’ll take his place
just look at them they ‘re praying to me
from his lips i’ll taste again
WHAT’S A GIRL
What’s a girl to do, what’s a girl to do
dead by matches on a red dirty mattress under you
bleak enough for two throw-up in pales at the mention of males
even you what’s a girl to do
throw my pennies and I throw my privilege
and I violate for you and I escalate towards you I won’t sin
I moan him and I suffocated in you - what’s a girl to do
what makes everything seem something I’d never want to do
pack my paintings and I pack my cookies
6
rules, fools, the idiots that shower them in flowers
praise them great in open song
color by numbers copy one another I’ll wolf you
promise stupid tiny bells
ain’t find no favor for stacking for the tilted
this fairground is getting close to closing won’t it stop me?
rank, split, my eyes are choked with water
seeing haters finger point at lesser skin
rupture, young lovers with rape and rank
it shudders me to see the better thing as sin
I won’t believe that her of ways, of worth, of less of him
done back for others what split
the hearts of mothers I know a quieting
behind the corn scratches diseased from the pities
you’ve passed around oh chicklet marry to me overseas
LEATHER SIDE
I’ve been lied to again
from the head of the fields
through the lanes to my knees
and I will wait until they pull down the sun
I’m stretching blood, I’m breathing again
they got up and left
they’re finished with me
I’m numbered again
I don’t even care
I’ll wear it on a leather side
I’m smiling again because it never grows thin
lifting my skin, they’re cutting if whole
just look fiavonti my son
I think it’s time to tell
lying with the wet moon swing is old
they said someone has been killed
but it’s just one of them…. so who even cares.
DARLIN DARLIN
where am I going to get some sleep
where am I going to get some sleep this time
light a candle, light a cigarette
I bet the world is on fire
I don’t know… I know it’s much too late
I’ve been here seven hundred times
and I’ m well aware that I’m not likely to regret leaving them behind like this
they came from underneath my bed
they stood around me and said “lay back we’re going for a ride”
I said the knot was way too tight
take the chair my spine can’t wail all night
pin my eyes I’m going to get some sleep
my faith has been retired
clean my suit I have to look just right
I’ve got one nail left in me yet
It’s sketchy stop screaming
I think I am dying, collapsing, kids barking “you’re so jealous”
will the girls still like me nine days from now
they will paint my face and fix my hair like LEE
God how I’m the envy of them all
blame Seattle, blame the fake toupee
It’s all about to tremble so change direction
I’m headed out to see this time
STRANGE AS FAMILY
strange as family
I think that it started it faded from memory placed with mittens - why?
should I listen in now she has gone
comes a courting comes a calling no explanation
he is different he is Asian brings me humid - why?
I’m spoken for I’m kitchened
he is unwelcome he is unwelcome
makes note of my towels, my blankets, my flowers
I don’t think I’m ultra act
plants and water flow by flow sleep me box me glow glow glow
I know the coming things oh please
peace be with you
a line from the masses said as Johnny passes
ten years coasting why? I’m ripened up I’m injured
lifted early fixed above us keeping a promise to name you among us why?
the johns the greater go? and the most vivid things
MINION
deaux ou trois pour et demander par ses son description diun is what they were painting
it finally made sense to me jene toi comprehen pas francaise
I can see my breath in your room
came the storm it was bigger
I think he said kaddish for me
I could have sworn it was Hebrew
he could not find a minion
stay with me please look it can’t you read can’t cook
babies in their milk of mum don esse pour trois et centos
can’t remember the last lime I spoke
and she shouted its careless
he promised to dovan faster
then his look was so helpless
he started to move in slowly
stay with me please look it can’t you read
proteje damx mais san sez de vieux
CRAWLING
out of bed my limbs are screaming
hit the floor I lose another line
crawling with the things I’m seeing
fix my bones they’re coming after me
I never know but I take more than I can
tracking my veins lets me out again
tell the dead I’m cold and freezing
lie me down I’m ready for the push
drag me out I must be sinking
put me through before they shut me tight
I never learn
still I take more than I can
it tracks my veins as it lets me out again
and it takes me down again
and it takes me out again
RUTH
oh Ruth untie the boat
these kisses at your throat
ask is Ruth in there
safe grade school winter warm
glue smell and tracing hands
make leaves and more leaves
there is an infinite of burns
finding David in the ferns
my stars it’s juarez Mexico
seamless in Spanish pants
just three years later
from underneath the sand
with roots and bugs in hand
she chews and listens
happens heck as into hell
and a sex that calls to Christ to help
It’s an animal it’s a god
she moves through the well dressed dancing couples
alone but not bothered by it
and totally involved with her fruit
no one asks her to dance even though it’s supposed to be her party
and the boysies find her total and slowish
spinning past as the firsting finish last by done
1:30 and I’m hungry of noon and a luncheon of ruthie
1:50 as I’m dreaming a June and a garden of bursting
It’s 1950 over again where is my fresh diner daisy?
LEARNED IN SPACE
I’ve got a second land wife she is my something to give to them
I’ll bury her in the weeds it looks like a safe place to me
wonder where I put my wings this time I’ve left them around
It’s breathing It’s scratching It’s my baby where am I going to
and stepping on the roof are the sexless and aged show girls
I find myself becoming aroused by white thigh girls with the know
alive for now with others to spare bless my head
a few days ago I had vertigo seizure they’re taking my insides
I’m dying I may be calling out for the year
on an alien came a sign of what was
everything I’ve ever learnt I learned in space
WILLIAM
you’ve got a lot to learn was whispered in my ear
I’ll be watching from above
I’m not scared any more
but I’ll miss you as time goes by
I hope you hear my voice
I hope your breathing free
your the wonder of their year I’m sure
they’re happy to see you happy to be with you
I want you to know how I feel
what it means inside to grow and die
but with you I’ll always live
and I’ll never never never let you go
DOWN TO THE SERVICE
got to the service and fell on my lazy
my son, get out of here
they don’t want you so don’t turn back
take away this gay U.S.
they wonder why I want to live
I want to die, I want to take what’s mine
they always say, “what went wrong my son”
standing proud over you looking down
laughing like I only can
take my gun and I’ll take away warm anything
BEHOLD ME
There’s a twisting of things and it starts till it rings
comes as cold then it’s gone can you help me
there’s a struggle of pants and of skin covered ants
and with that it’s done to can you help me
there’s a darkening joy as I’m both girl and boy
have my way with ourselves can you help me
the things I know / behold me / one side of me
DAKOTA
the Dakota is down and lost off the track
check the directions
you can finger us here and I’m sure we’d be there
sweat the directions
it always happens
into the gray skies
has the Twins been found with rats all around
getting sick in the basement
got me there and lost with sweat pouring down
sorry meet your replacement
I’m only kidding Jerry
it always seems I’m late I had to do some errands
I’ll be there in just a bit don’t wait up for me
they’re at it again just listen to them
running straight to mother
I got to get it done
we’re handing it in on the second (it will never happen)
KEVIN’S HELL
I’ll pass on that forget you ever sent it here
low arms to dance fashion levels tapping at the seasons
killing anyone who would know I’ll light the way, the day, the everything
I see and I know it’s a show
so take the car back I think it’s trying to kill me
here’s my face with holes can you see through in here, this way,
In here I’m keeping them like this it’s great but don’t tell
if you do I will have to keep you
look at them, they are happy just to see me
tie them in the basement
feed them apples and read their tarot
ADANOI
you ought to know
that everyone is asleep inside a church
it’s a social setting let it erase
stick it to the skin take a spike
here’s an eye hole through the wrists
“melech halom ba ray pre ha goffen adanoi”
take all the doubts wear the ideas
call it a faith and it’s the finest sunken show you’re in
I’ll head the concept so kiss my behind
I’ll take you where you want to be my son
Murray passed out five miles from the border
ME, THE MISSER, THE LATE
entry hundred forty-one me, the misser, the late
miss years to make words of what I’m missing
shame I’m shaking, a loss, a crap
hung by heartwrack in the grasslands me, the pridest, the slack
come through rain through window new approval seas a headrest, a home a peace
having all my needies covered me, the hoper, the hole
family leaver, shit repeater and a rancid grudge-hold
entry hundred forty-one starts back when I dared
God knock me down again not a single thing I’ve done meant a scrap
changed the stance of anyone thought by now I’d left the barn
but I’m scared the fields, and I’m scared the houses, I’m scared the millers yard.
DUST
won’t somebody tell me what this heaven’s about
it’s been coming for years and I’ve noticed it’s almost here
you’re just one of us so take to the hills
hide the underground it’s almost time
I got away I keep all my guns in an oak cabinet
I’ll be ready for the next time because I never forget
my father bleeds his history in everyday
GRAY COMPLEXION
you got your mother call on the touch that you know so well
and it’s in and old cure the palms that drip black honey
it’s the steam that seeps from below
pull in the cords that froze over night
it’s your gray complexion that I admire the most
in the aqua cement pit I placed the sugar on my tongue
so who will I call when I’ve decided to cease
STRENGTHLESS
strengthless with the arms of a woman
I’m scared in a country that’s measured by men
and the listing and the pulling of girls
makes a clean scrape of ego and arrogant dead
hide me down me to tiny living slip sister’s new doll house
and raise up a home you’ll miss me that’s certain
my devil’s at the curtain
bless me take me churching to river as head cuts the water
I’m small God shrieks, like a femme when he spots me
I’m crazy black beetle ignoring them all
got away with the crown of God
I’ll set up scenes of bodies bent for me
and if it’s not true then I’ll pray to you
I’ll start the praying see wait and see
more and more it’s a sexy war I’m a man I’m a weakfish and pure unrest
urgent news rings from Europe the gloating winners
soured of a crease through his face folds him
rabbit bag handsome
things I want I’ll do I know I’m small
I get away with the big ones
DECIDED GIRL
a showy, young planet bulged to near
near bursting but driven by moonrise and physical things
rising oceans from bottom boards
from floater fish from sandy salt
look closer I’m waving back at you
a brutish last curtain sections you from your joy
cuts into you and boy you’ll beg me back…decide
a spoiled young cry girl choking pride
revenge on old ghosties drives you past the fracture mark
sharing Ted makes you cry…decide
BROKEN
Save me from myself
just one more the feeling’s fading
Shake me from this dream
It seems so real I can’t erase it.
Consider me a loss
I’ve come undone
It’s left me broken
Bring this to end
Throw away your words unspoken.
They say it can’t be true
Not a boy like you
They’ll never understand
Close your eyes it comes so easy.
Produced by Pedal Boy & the Wrens
Released 1994, Grass Records
1994
